Okay, LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH !!!!!

Okay, things have been crazy here and I haven't had a lot of time or frankly the inclination to write the happy, cheerful crap one of you suggested I write...I tried it, didn't like it and so I am going back to my original game plan and using MY BLOG to vent my utter, loathsome, mind bending, stomach wrenching frustration with the world in general...if you don't like the negative lean, don't read it ! 

In actuality, if I didn't vent on this blog by pounding the keyboard with pent up physical anger, I might do R some bodily harm...I wouldn't want that....I'd be in jail and he would be enjoying a Cathy free house...hahahaha I make it sound like we don't get along but I love the guy to bits, it's just that he ends up being the whipping boy because he is the only one around...ahahahahha

GOD DAM IT.....I HATE FARMING AND ALL THINGS TO DO WITH FARMING
Yesterday morning we were getting ready to head into the city to have the brake control for our stock trailer replaced...the first one only lasted 4 years. hmmffff
R went out to do his chores and found a dead bull.  THAT'S RIGHT....a DEAD BULL .... we have nine bulls all together....but i bet you can guess which one died....no?..  the best one of course...Our best $5000. bull  "SLICK"  he was not sick, as a matter of fact, R saw him just the day before...he seemed fine and then he was dead.  It couldn't have been the one with the bad feet, or the one from BC with the really bad attitude that charges R all the time...or the one that throws crappy calves...or the big black 10 yr old who barely passed the semen test.  NNNOOOOOOOOOOO it had to be the one that throws awesome calves, has great feet, is a real sweet heart to work with and scored the best on the semen test...we had worked out a breeding list for this year and Slick was supposed to get the biggest group of cows....now we have to scramble to make a new list....we don't want to give too many cows to the bull with bad feet, or the one with the bad attitude and we can't give the black bull with the low semen count too many or they won't get bred in time....we can't rush out and buy a replacement because we bought one new bull this year already but he is too young to give too many cows too....and we bought that stupid baler so we are strapped for cash....  but that isn't the point anyway....it just can't stand the shit that happens on the farm...WE LIVE BY MURPHY'S LAW and consider him an optimest. 

Of course the bulls death put a pall on the rest of our day, hard to spend money frivolously and enjoy yourself when your $5000. bull is laying dead in his corral being cut apart by the vet during an autopsy...

We went to the city inspite of the bad start...got to the appointment on time, and had the new brake control put in the truck....but it didn't work...so the tech had to go over the wiring harness from front to back and finally after an hour and a half of me sitting in the truck waiting R finally comes to tell me it won't be long, they found some bad wire connections that the first outfit who put the control in originally had made and that is why the control quit working.....sooooooooo  we had a $150. control put in that we didn't actually need....just needed to fix a bad connection.... but that's my R....like the time he replaced the fuel pump on the big grain truck after it stalled on the road.... $549. for a new pump and it took him and I, two days to change it over...and it still didn't work...it turned out to be a $0.90 fuse.....hahahahahahahahah

Yesterday R asked the pharmacist at costco (a tall slim blonde woman, I think he was flirting with her) if she had anything for severe depression...she asked who it was for and he said him... and then told her about the bull being dead.  OMG I nearly choked.... every once in a while we would look across at each other throughout the day and just shake our heads, it was so surreal. I think we were in shock... about the whole thing.

R is being quite zen about the whole bull thing this morning...saying it won't be so bad...we'll just use the bulls we have and not worry because we will probably end up selling off half the herd this summer anyway if the weather is as bad as they are predicting...and we have more drought and grasshoppers than last year...the dug outs didn't get filled this spring because we only had a foot of snow and there was no run off...  so ya...you wonder why I hate farming so much....try doing it with no off farm income .....and shit like this happens....
But there is one good thing to come of all this...R is no longer able to turn a blind eye to just how bad the industry has become and now talks about getting out of farming all on his own...I quite talking to him about it over a year ago...since it just upset him to think about getting out of it.

We can't really do that...or I mean we could ...but we would lose money...we need to wait, if we can hold out long enough, for things to turn around and land prices to pick up and then get out...but I suspect that should that happen, I will have a fight on my hands to convince him to bail out when things are good.