Today I ...

Today I woke up in a foul mood. It was 30 degrees here yesterday with virtually no wind so when it starts to cool down at night I open all the windows.  The problem with that is that when the coyotes are close, which they were last night, really close, in my front yard, I could see them. They yipe and kiyie all night, talking to  each other...no sleep for me.  So around 5 am they finally start moving away from the yard and I can only here them at a distance now, much better, but by then the birds were twittering and that evil little bitch squirrel is chattering like crazy, telling all her kind that danger is close (ie: coyotes)   At 6 am, in and out of sleep, I hear Rbt get up and quietly close the window....most days he would head outside and haul some bales, which is what he did the past two days and I was able to sleep, undisturbed for a couple more hours...but he slips back into bed and starts rubbing my back....

WARNING:  for those of you uninterested in my very personal life skip the following paragraph...

Rbt persisted in trying awaken me by the old and might I add ineffective, romantic back rub, in spite of my desperate attempt to ignore him and fall asleep again...but after nearly an hour of on again off again pestering I finally spoke to him......"IF YOU WERE ON THE VERGE OF FALLING ASLEEP AND I STARTED TO RUB YOUR BACK, WOULD IT MAKE YOU SLEEP OR WAKE YOU UP ?"

We have talked about this until I am sick to death of it. Lucky him, he sleeps like the dead and hears nothing... I on the other hand, am a horribly light sleeper and pain and night sweats are constantly waking me. We go to bed around 11 pm. he snores the moment his head hits the pillow and I read until about 1 am before I can sleep.  So at 6 am he is all bright eye, bushy tailed and I am dragging my ass around with only 4-5 hours of very poor quality sleep then he gets offended when I am angry he wakes me up...Sometimes spouseacide looks like a very good option. Jail doesn't seem so bad, I've always wanted to get a degree.

I went to sit down in the armchair with a soda and sandwich last night and when I reached for the lever to raise the foot rest lost the grip on the plate and watched in horror as my sandwich went ass over tea kettle and landed on my pants...mayo, margarine and mustard, oh and a very juicy ripe tomato slice slid down the side of my pants to land on the leather seat...It took me fifteen minutes to clean the mess and by then I had missed half my show...God damn it.

I hope I can sleep better tonight. Damned coyotes.

You know what the answer is, you just chose to ignore it...