Times LIke These

God, it's times like this I have to ask myself why I started this blog again....the days just fly by and I feel pressured to write something..hahahaha and it's all from me...that's the kicker.

Yesterday, I had a bit of a melt down...the stress builds for me and like the lid on a bad jar of tomatoes...sooner or later it's gonna blow. hahaha

So today, I am in more of a zen phase which is good since R and I are working our crazy cows again. This time no needles...just sorting them into different pens for breeding with particular bulls. It is fullfilling our God craving.. We pick which bull gets which cows and wait 9 months to see the results...sometimes it good, sometimes not so much.

The day started out great...R and I were on the same page..as per how to proceed...really things went along swimmingly until we got to the yearlings...(the teenagers of the cow world), rebellious, moody and highstrung...they don't want to be split up, where one goes they all go...at once...even if the gate isn't open...sigh.....get my drift.   bloody little twats...we had to bring them back in and start all over...but finally...R and I demonstrated why humans are at the top of the food chain...and out smarted them.

I watched the funniest thing happen when I was in the house after having finished...R was out with the tractor feeding the different bunches...and the bunch he was with at this time had followed down a bit of a hill, when a few straggler calves from that bunch came down another hill from the corrals and couldn't see the rest of their little herd over the rise so they ran down along the main fence and out the gate R had come into the pen through, across a bale yard and along another fence and then panic set in and they went through the wires..and in with a different bunch of cows...not the one thier mothers were in...so tonight there will be bellowing and I won't get any sleep...until R goes out in the morning and re sorts the buggers. I sometimes wonder why we bother...

I contemplate whether I should tell you this next bit of info..but I think it is the only way to give you the true picture of my life...so I will disclose these details and hope you don't think any less of me with the telling.

Tomorrow I have to shoot a calf...it was injured a month ago when its mother was fighting with another cow and trampled it. It has just slowly been going down hill and now can no longer get up on its feet. The cow barely looks after it and it is very sad...the kindest thing to do is do it in. so I will make a little walk down the hill and put it to rest.  Another pebble on my scale of heaven verses hell for my final destination... I am afraid I am going to burn in hell for eternity for all the kittens, porcupines and what not that I have terminated... I don't do that stuff lightly, only with good reason.. I mean someone has to put a limit on things or the world would look like the grounds of the University of Victoria...over run with waskilly wabbits.  when I do this sort of thing...I always end up bawling my eyes out...I don't do it because I like to KILL things, good god it's just the opposite... I cry when baby calves are born dead...when our cats get run over on the road, when bulls die...and when birds break their necks flying into my windows....I even bury them... Last summer a humming bird was chased by a male hummer into my greenhouse...I still had screens on the windows then and he flew in through the door...I found it dead in there later that day...probably from heat exhaustion...I cried and then ripped the screens off the windows so I wouldn't be the cause of anymore birds dying...

Well I am beat...and am heading to bed.  I taped the movie documentary FOOD INC. tonight, if you get a chance to see it please do...it is all about factory farms...and the obliteration of the humain family farm.